Wanting Kids and Wanting More Time
By Stephanie Villavicencio
The Start of a Hard Lesson
I’m young, I’m healthy, I’m active as h*ll—and yet somehow, my body isn’t as “fit to be a mother” as I expected. For years, I ignored symptoms that made me think my hormones were out of balance. I was embarrassed to say anything, so I shoved it all under the rug.
I kept chasing pow days, obsessively mountain biking, hiking, taking surf trips, and hitting the gym between it all. After all, I’m healthy, right? Nothing to worry about.
The Wake-Up Call
After a few years of pushing through, the guilt crept in. You’re being a hypocrite. If I’m the founder of a nonprofit—Tits Deep for Breast Cancer—advocating for young women’s health, I should take mine just as seriously. So I finally grew the courage to order an at-home hormone test.
The results? My fertility-related hormones were in an abnormal range. It was disheartening. I had never once considered that I might have “trouble” conceiving. And so began my journey of understanding my body, fertility, and what growing a baby might look like for me.
The Doctor’s Conversation I’ll Never Forget
Two months later, my OBGYN ordered a second set of labs (turns out you don’t just get one hormone test—our levels fluctuate day to day).
Those results? Pretty much the same.
Then came the serious talk.
“You have a low ovarian reserve. It’s genetic.”
“I encourage you to start trying this year—don’t wait more than 12 months. Otherwise you may need alternative treatments like IVF.”
This was April 2025, and I’m still trying to wrap my head around it.
The Mid-30s Body Plot Twist
Being a woman in your mid-30s comes with so much no one prepares you for.
Suddenly my periods are shorter—two days instead of four—and closer together. Night sweats before my cycle. And a doctor casually mentioning that these can be early signs of pre-perimenopause.
WTF even is pre-perimenopause?
I can’t imagine what would’ve happened if I ignored my symptoms for another year. Honestly, I don’t want to think about it. Because the truth is…I’m still not ready to start trying. I always imagined waiting until my late 30s to start a family. I wish I could buy myself more time.
But my body feels like a ticking time bomb. If I don’t start now…will I ever get pregnant?
If you’re experiencing symptoms that feel atypical, talk to a Women’s Health Physician. It might give you answers, options, and time—something I wish I had more of.
Lessons That Taught Me to Take Action in a Changing Body
- Don’t ignore your symptoms for years like I did.
- Find a doctor who listens and helps you understand what’s going on.
- Talk to your friends. You’re not alone. Some of mine are experiencing similar symptoms.
- Discuss the options openly—with your partner if you have one. Don’t let it be the elephant in the room.
- Know that our bodies are always changing. In your 30s, you might be approaching pre-perimenopause earlier than expected.
About Tits Deep for Breast Cancer
Tits Deep for Breast Cancer is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit founded in Aspen, CO. Our mission is to support young women seeking breast cancer treatment through advocacy, education, and outreach. We help women under 40 understand their risks because 1 in 8 women will be diagnosed in their lifetime.
Our soon-to-launch grant program will financially assist young women in receiving mammogram screenings.
We host community-driven, women-focused events and fundraisers centered around outdoor adventure sports—skiing, snowboarding, backcountry touring, mountain biking, and more. We have chapters in Colorado, Tahoe (CA), and recently launched in Bend, OR!
BTW—we’ll be a vendor at Boot Tan Fest in April 2025!