Coach Mama: What Teaching Kids (and Mine) Has Taught Me

By Iris Hrabe-Ritzert

“I want to go snowboarding again…to Mammoth!” This comes from the back seat of our car at 7:30 am in the morning on our way to preschool and work. “Yew”, I say, “that was so much fun, we’ll go again next winter, it’s spring”. It’s May now. Silence. And then he starts crying. There’s always a lot of expression of feelings. “What song do you want to listen to?” I ask to distract him. “The little snowplow”, says the shaky voice from the backseat. “That’s not a song, that’s your favorite book, silly goose. How about Blippi’s excavator song?” I suggest. Two little hands start to clap, and I see the tear-covered face light up through the mirror. “Sadie goes to Mammoth, too. She has gloves!” Phew, I turned him around.

The (not so) little snowplow is one of our favorite books.

We live in San Diego, California, it’s 77 and sunny right now. We’re in shorts. Snowboarding, the mountains, and gloves are all far away, and yet, my second-born, 2.5-year-old little guy seems to remember our frequent snowboarding trips this season and is frothing. But he’s also very open-hearted, passionate, and gets easily frustrated, to say the least. Almost always. So riding with him hasn’t been easy.

I also taught my almost 10-year-old son how to snowboard. He is a typical firstborn, Type A personality. Following rules, go-getter all the way, athletically talented, and even-tempered. I also taught him how to bike, how to Ollie, and how to surf. All it took was Covid, gummy bears, well, and something I’ll explain later. He’s very close to or better than me at every single sport now, but snowboarding, where I give him about 2 more seasons until he catches up weight-wise.

Teaching Kids, and Mine

The point I’m trying to make is that I’m a little further along than many of the moms in this wonderful community when it comes to my older son, while with my second-born, I’m right where many of you are now. Over the past few years, I’ve learned so much from moms who are a step ahead with older kids, and I truly value that exchange. I hope that sharing some of my own experiences and hard-learned lessons from the past ten years might be helpful to some of you at this stage. Before I had my second child, I liked to think that my husband and I just teach and parent fairly well (ha!). The latter, I realized, is BS, but the first one is the “something” I mentioned earlier and I’d like to share that with you.

Studying sports science meant doing all the sports, here on a field trip, mountaineering in Slovenia, Iris in red.

Sports have been part of my life for as long as I can remember, and they’ve quietly shaped where I am today. With a Diplom in Sports Science (comparable to an in-depth master's degree), I started out coaching as a teenager in sports like figure skating, gymnastics, skiing, snowboarding, and whatever else came my way and somehow, I never really stopped. Teaching was never the plan, but it stayed. It wove itself into everything. These days, it shows up in small, everyday moments with my kids, their friends, and even the occasional brave adult. And I still find it just as rewarding: that moment when confidence lifts, when something clicks, when you can almost hear Neurons forming new connections.

At the same time, I’m still learning what all of this really means. One thing that stands out: every one of my fellow sports science grads who went on to have kids has raised incredible young athletes. With that sample size, it’s not exactly a study you’d publish in Nature, but it’s enough to make you pause. You could point to genetics, sure. Many of these parents are strong athletes themselves. But I keep coming back to something else: how these kids were introduced to movement, challenge, and learning in the first place. 

Your energy, your consistency, and what fits your family

And maybe that’s where your story comes in. You don’t need a degree in sports science to raise kids who love what they do and grow into it with confidence. What matters is what you bring to it. Your energy, your consistency, the way you guide them through it. So take what resonates, leave what doesn’t, and shape it into something that fits your family.

Watch mom frothing.

1. Always show them your own excitement! And that’s part of what I’ve noticed: my fellow sports science graduates never stopped doing their thing when they had kids. Their kids watched their parents head out the door or paddle out, excited, and come back glowing, over and over again. Kids are astonishing little emotional antennas. They can feel when a parent is tense, hesitant, or uncomfortable long before a word is spoken. If they see fear in your face, they’ll mirror it. But if they see you laughing after getting tumbled in the whitewash, grinning with snow stuck to your eyelashes, or genuinely enjoying the adventure even when it’s messy and cold, they learn that challenge and joy can exist together. That’s the foundation for everything that follows. 
   
   
2. Start them young and don’t stop. Don’t wait for the “right time” to teach them. We all know by now it doesn’t exist, not for pregnancy, not for a trip, not for that beautiful RV. If you really want it, you just have to go for it. So get your kids used to wearing a wetsuit, carrying a backpack, sleeping in a tent, bundling up in winter gear (“Sadie wears gloves, too!”), or sitting in a harness as early as possible. Let them get comfortable being a little uncomfortable. And this matters: invest in the best gear you can afford. My go-to is used, but high-quality.
   
   
3. Erase “my kid doesn’t listen to me” from your vocabulary. Put on your teacher hat, maybe literally. I used to wear a special red “coach beanie.” When it was on, I was Coach Mama. Be fun, but be clear. Be the kind of teacher who sets kids up to succeed in a way they can actually feel. And maybe, but only maybe, “feel” means enjoying some gummy bears or another treat they don’t get often.
   
   
4. Educate yourself. There are so many great resources online from schools and educators around the world. Make a plan. Sketch out a simple teaching rhythm. Watching a ski instructor won’t magically make you one. Learn a proper warm-up, a few fun drills, and age-appropriate exercises. Have a sense of where you’re going, even if it’s loose.
   
   
5. Consistency is everything. It took you years to get good at what you do, and it will take them time too. In the first couple of seasons, those long days on the bunny hill can drag on, even when you’re having fun. You’ll be cold from “just one more wave.” Make it a routine. Find small things along the way to keep it fresh. Go often, maybe even more often than you feel like. It will pay off. I 100% promise.
   
   
6. Rally a crew! As the kids get a little older and more confident, friends to ride will become the best teachers. There’s something about being around older kids who are just a bit more skilled and a bit braver, it pulls them forward in the best way. If you can find a couple of like-minded families to share the experience with, you’re set. And honestly, what better place to start than a Mothership Rally the Village event near you?

My older son joined a surf team and improved so much in the few months he surfed with them; they “chaired” him when he won his division at a contest this spring. 

Focus on the can-do

Sometimes the can-do is eating a cookie and strapping Moo in…but hey, uphill!

And maybe this is where it all comes together. Every child is different. I learned that the hard way with our younger one. But years of teaching have helped me zoom out a bit. When emotions run high and the will is strong, I try to meet them where they are: focus on what they can do, what they genuinely enjoy, and build from there. That’s really the thread running through all of this: Show up with your own stoke, start early, stay consistent, keep learning, and surround them with the right people. The rest unfolds in its own time and I promise, they will surprise you in return.

Parenting is still hard. We’re all figuring it out as we go. And as the kids grow, the stakes grow with them. So, to the moms with teenagers, I’m genuinely curious: how do you think about risk when the jumps get bigger, the waves get heavier, and real consequences enter the picture? How do you balance letting them fly with keeping them safe? I have a feeling that conversation is just as important as everything that came before.

About Iris

Born and raised in Germany’s Allgäu, Iris traded the Alps for the Pacific Ocean 14 years ago and now calls San Diego home. As a surf and outdoor industry veteran, Iris has steered marketing ships for the likes of Billabong, Element Skateboards, Swox, or Voited, without losing her saltwater grin. When she’s not creating and executing marketing strategies or refereeing negotiations between her two groms, Iris is out chasing waves, riding her snowboard, and can occasionally be found in the skatepark and the boulder gym. An equal-opportunity frother, she works as a freelancer in the outdoor and boardsports marketing world and collaborates on select part-time projects that spark her interest.